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Self-Esteem

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Self-Esteem

Get help with self-esteem

A healthy relationship with yourself should be a top priority. Low self-esteem can
negatively impact almost all areas of your life. Connect with yourself + discover self-love. ♡
You are Not Alone.

Approximately 85% of the population

is affected by low self-esteem.

know the signs & symptoms

  • People Pleasing
  • Being Self-Critical
  • Feeling Unworthy
  • Comparing to Others
  • Negative Self-Talk
  • Feelings of Self-Doubt
  • Lacking Confidence
  • Can’t Accept Compliments
  • Minimizing Your Achievements

Self-love + self-compassion are the very basic foundation of self-esteem. Plus, it sets the standard for all the other relationships in your life. If you are unable to love yourself, you are missing the basic building block of self-esteem. Building self-esteem & self-worth is a commitment to yourself. It’s a promise to honor, love, and respect who you really are.  So many of us feel unlovable, unworthy, or not good enough. Through self-compassion, re-connecting with yourself, and intentionally engaging in things that make you feel good, you can access the power within you!

Understanding Self-Esteem

What is self-esteem? Simply, self-esteem refers to the way you feel about yourself – both consciously and unconsciously. When you struggle with low self-esteem it’s a sign that you are deeply disconnected from yourself.

Self-Esteem impacts all Areas of your life:

  1. Social Interactions
  2. Relationships
  3. Job Performance
  4. Physical & Mental Health
  5. Academic Performance
  6. Your Identity & Self-Worth
  7. Your Sense of Belonging
  8. Overall Happiness
  9. How We React to Situations

Individuals with healthy self-esteem feel well-liked and accepted by others. They are proud of their accomplishments, feel good about themselves, and are not scared to speak up when necessary. They trust their judgment, tolerate failure, and problem-solve. On the other hand, people with low self-esteem tend to be harder on themselves and often struggle with “not being good enough.” They may perceive the world as a negative place, struggle with decision-making, have perfectionistic standards, and be less tolerant of their failures or setbacks.

Self-Esteem affects your communication style

Your self-esteem affects your communication style. If you struggle with low self-esteem, you may find yourself using a passive communication style. Passive communication reinforces low self-esteem. The healthiest way to communicate is by being assertive. Assertiveness builds your self-esteem because you are clear about what you need and want. Evaluate your most commonly used communication style.

How do you communicate? There are three basic communication styles, described in this graphic. They include being passive, such as thinking “I’m ok with whatever you want,” being assertive, like thinking “Let’s meet in the middle,” and being aggressive, such as thinking “We need to do it this way or else.” Additional examples of passive behavior include believing your needs don't matter, not using your voice, trying to keep the peace, giving in to others, and not saying what you need. The consequence of this may be damage to your self-esteem and people respect you less. Examples of being assertive include realizing your needs matter, being calm but firm, respect your needs and others' needs, stand up for yourself, and tell others what you need and want. This builds your self-esteem and improves relationships. Finally, examples of aggressive behavior include thinking only your needs matter, talking over people, looking out for yourself only, using aggression to get your way, and bullying others or being bossy. This behavior damages others' self-esteem and destroys relationships. Our Downers Grove relationship counselors are here to help.

causes of low self-esteem

How you talk to yourself plays a major role in your self-worth & self-confidence. Do you criticize yourself often? Are you hard on yourself when you make a mistake? Low self-esteem can leave you struggling with your identity, finding a place of belonging, and recognizing your own worth. Some factors that cause low self-esteem include:

  • Lack of Self-Love
  • Negative & Traumatic Experiences
  • Unhealthy Relationships
  • Faulty Beliefs about Oneself
  • Expectations from Parents During Childhood
  • Who You Spend Time With (family, friends, partners)

The good news about self-esteem is that it’s a subjective evaluation of your own worth. That’s right. It’s totally subjective – meaning it can be changed since it’s not based on facts but rather your own personal feelings. Heal Talk Therapy can help you find value in yourself and develop self-esteem through regular therapy sessions.

Get Control of Your Self-Esteem.

HEAL TALK THERAPY CAN HELP you:

  1. Learn to Put Yourself First
  2. Set Healthy Boundaries
  3. Overcome Self-Doubt
  4. Build Resilience & Self-Reliance
  5. Explore Causes of Low Self-Esteem
  6. Improve Personal Relationships
  7. Develop Self-Love & Acceptance
  8. Strengthen the Relationship with Yourself
  9. Enhance Self-Worth & Self-Compassion

Setting Boundaries promotes Self-Esteem

There is a close connection between your self-esteem level and your ability to set boundaries. Generally, the higher the self-esteem, the healthier the boundaries you set and vice versa. Creating healthy boundaries defines how you want to be treated and enhances your self-worth.

Are you setting healthy boundaries?.

A diagram showing the different types of boundaries.

Building your Self-Esteem

There are many changes that you could make to feel better about yourself. Being mindful of your negative self-talk is a good start to boosting your self-worth + self-confidence. Using helpful statements that are encouraging and demonstrate self-compassion can play a pivotal role in your happiness. Surround yourself with people who treat you well, respect you, & value you.
  • Practice self-love
  • Be kind to yourself
  • Eat well & exercise regularly
  • Set healthy boundaries
  • Do things you enjoy and try something new
  • Accept things you cannot change
  • Acknowledge your strengths & achievements
  • Improve coping skills & build resilience
  • Create a clean & comfortable living space
  • Identify root causes of low self-esteem
  • Set small achievable goals & work towards them
  • Spend time with people that make you happy

SELF-CARE for Self-Esteem

Practicing self-care and healthy habits are linked to improved self-esteem. It involves valuing yourself enough to make your health, happiness, and well-being a top priority. By taking care of yourself, you can reduce the negative effects of low self-esteem on your daily life. You will increase your ability to connect with yourself on a more authentic and deeper level. Integrating self-care is a powerful way to re-connect with yourself and energize your mind, body, and spirit.

This graphic shows examples of self-care, like get good sleep, set boundaries, eat well, take a social media break, move your body, connect with others, and manage stress. Contact a Hinsdale PTSD Counselor.

Take the next steps to Feel better about yourself

If you are looking to improve your relationship with yourself and enjoy life to the fullest, give us a call. We’re here to listen, guide, and support you. A therapist at Heal Talk Therapy will offer compassion, insight, and expertise so you don’t have to go through this journey alone. Choose to live a life that promotes your best self!
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